Calcium Kisses for two

Originally entered in http://thecultofme.blogspot.co.uk/ monthly competition

cult

“Oh, dear, whatever made you think adopting a Human would be a good idea?”

“I’m sorry sweetheart, but it’s not like that barren ribcage is bound for harvesting anytime soon”.

“I can’t believe you’d say that to me!”

“Look, cover those bones all you like, but life does not abound in a belly from below”.

The pair stared at each other for some time, too long for the child, torn between them, almost.

“Erm, excuse me, I don’t mean to intrude, but would you mind terribly deciding my fate? These coals don’t half burn and that scythe does tend to serrate the finger tips some”.

The skeletal couple looked upon the little boy and sighed.

“It’s up to you dear, either we keep it or we eat it”.

“I don’t know. I have love to spare, you know that”.

“I do”.

“But it’s awfully tempting. I mean, look at those thighs”.

“Yep”.

“And those arms…”

“Hmmm.”

“And those cheeks!”

“Oh, stop, my mouth is watering. Tell you what, let’s take the soul. Once it’s out, there’s nothing to be done with the skin and flesh but sauté and flambé. Just think of the things you can do. You can finally use that cooking book your mother gave you last Christmas”.

As she pondered her husband’s suggestion, the child’s clothes caught light. A whoosh of red and orange shot up his body and engulfed the night gown. Gazing on the potential snack, they admired the blonde hair, turned to blaze and the cheeks blushed to red.

“Honey”.

She continued to stare.

“HONEY!”

She snapped out of it and looked on her husband.

“We can always find another. They produce like rabbits after all. But…”

“I know”.

“You want a child. You’ve been on about it for centuries”.

“I know”.

“And every time we get here, it’s hmmm this and tasty that and scrumptious…”

“I KNOW!”

“Whoa now, come on, no need to snap. We’re not one of those couples now, are we?”

She hung her head.

“No, I’m sorry”.

“Remember what the Doc said?”

“I know, we’re a team”.

“That’s right”.

“I’m sorry, dear”.

The pair clinked a calcium deprived kiss.

“So, what’s it to be? A new member of the family or a new dish from the book?”

The pair looked down on the charred child and smiled at him and then back at each other. There was an understanding glint in their eye cavities that said it all. The little boy, smouldering and blackened did his best to endear himself, twisting a foot this way and that and smiling.

“I’ll get the spit, you grab the roast”.

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